Rainbows, Rubbish, Ravings and Ramblings of my Random Existence

25 February 2014

Book Meme

I can't post pictures anymore because my computer sucks and almost every prim is rezzing pink in my viewers at the moment. It's frustrating but I am too lazybusy in RL to troubleshoot this.

But I can't pass this meme up, even though my reading habits embarass me as much as I refuse to admit I have been roleplaying as a slave-in-training in SL recently. (No, that was definitely not me you saw in the BDSM sim because I will never be caught dead in that place, and no, that was definitely not my alt because she doesn't look like me at all although, yeah, she does speak a little like me, if her "Master" allows her to speak at all.) (Many people speak like me. Just telling you gently.) (I'll do a whole blog post about this as soon as I can. But you will have to wait till I can find my words.)

Let's get on to business, shall we?

1. Are you a bookworm?
Yes and no, depending on how you look at it. I read a lot more back when I was in school decades ago, if textbooks can be counted. Now I do the occasional reading, and I actually try to avoid it because I've been known to be dazed or zombielike when I am halfway into a book. I was almost knocked down by a car once because my mind was no longer on earth.

2. Which do you prefer: hardcover, paperback or electronic?
Probably paperback. When I get into a book I want to carry it everywhere I go until I am done with it. Hardcovers are heavy and I don't own a gadget that can open up electronic copies anytime anywhere I am.

3. Which book is your favorite?
I can't really tell. I drift from one favourite to another. My most recent favourite will be the "Hunger Games" series. I read it a few years ago but I haven't since read anything that tops it. I know it is teenage fiction or something, but in all seriousness adult books do not necessarily write better than this.

4. Which children's book is your favorite?
Enid Blyton's "The Magic Faraway Tree" series.

5. What's the last book you've read?
"The Space between Us" by Thrity Umrigar. It's about two Indian women from different social classes helping and then turning against each other, sort of.

6. Name your top five favorite writers:
I don't really keep track of writers, my tendency is to just grab a book and see if it holds my interest. But I'll go with Enid Blyton, Roald Dahl, Anne Rice and Sophie Kinsella aka Madeleine Townley. These are the writers who's books I would stop for. Yes, I still love children books. Can't think of a fifth writer.

7. Name a book that had a strong impact on you:
Can't think of any. Maybe religious books? lol

8. Favorite and least favorite book genres?
Comedy is definitely my favourite. (Love Sophie Kinsella!) I liked fantasy when I was younger and I am learning to appreciate science fiction a bit more these days. Romance is probably low on my list, but I still read it because it is relaxing.

9. Favorite and least favorite book-to-movie adaptions?
I thought the Hunger Games was pretty good. I also did like "The Queen of the Damned" although the reviews said otherwise, it was what got me to start reading Anne Rice's works. Can't name any least favourites because I don't watch enough movies.

10. Have you ever bought a book based on the cover alone?
No, I put a lot of importance into the plot and writing style. I must read a few paragraphs before I decide I want to buy and read it.

11. Where do you usually buy your books?
I buy books anywhere, but the airport is probably where I buy the most books. As I had mentioned, I avoid reading because it disrupts my life. But there is nothing like a book to kill time on a plane, especially if you are the sort who flies budget as often as you can, where you don't get meals or TV.

12. Do you go to the library?
Occasionally. I avoid it. lol

13. How many books do you own?
Collecting books take up too much space, so I do not hoard. I have less than 100 in my possession.

14. If you were to write a book about Second Life, which topic would you focus on?
Fiction, since it is the only thing I read. If I knew my plot, I would probably complete a book by now.

Posted by Tashi Core

18 February 2014

Hope Meme

I didn't plan to blog or do anything about SL for a while yet, I am (not so) urgently seeking a job in RL. But Berry is a blogger from SL I have come to love. I can feel her loss even if I do not know the details, so I am taking up this meme that her bestie Winter Jefferson has suggested we do.

When was I at my lowest point? How did I pull through and triumph to become the dazzling specimen of humanity I am today? When I reached out... who was there to help me back up again? What gave me hope?

I am sitting back now, thinking through all that stuff throughout the years. My fingers have turned cold. And I can't even tell you what really happened, because so many secrets are not mine to share.

I am not a dazzling specimen of humanity, I am a messy human. I messed up my own life as much as I allowed somebody else in to mess me up. I didn't pull through by reaching out, getting help or seeking hope.

I am sorry but I really didn't. I pulled through by sheer determination not to let myself and my loved ones down. When it came down to it, I walked along the borderlines of depression and insanity for years, struggling to find my balance. Through time, and much willpower, it became easier to find an equilibrium. My prize is in understanding myself deeper each time something happens. I also become good at drawing lines and letting in only people who are not troublemakers, but there are times when I get thrown off-balance again. In fact, it happens quite frequently. I am still learning. But then this is life, isn't it? At least this is how it works for me.

As for my love life, I am still dealing with the residue of so many secrets that are not mine to share. I am sorry if I can't make sense by telling you more. I have reasons for not sharing about my love life in both SL and RL. It isn't so much to do with keeping personal things personal, but more to do with protecting people I love. But some of my blog readers who are attentive to small details may have observed and guessed that there is someone in my life who is always not around. Did I say too much now?

I suppose I can distract you by telling you about that girl I once looked up to as a sister who betrayed me with lies. Over a guy of course. Maybe I can tell you about that guy I had loved and respected so deeply, who decided that I could be insulted because the girl he loved more needed protection and I apparently didn't. I can tell you about that other girl who did so many things because she was jealous and wanted to oust me out of our group of common friends. Because of men, of course. Several men, most of whom I wasn't romantically interested in, some of whom I didn't even know existed. And the boyfriend I thought was my prince of destiny but was really a jerk jerk JERK. And about losing my job, having all my savings conned, and hooking up into an affair that messed up my life forever. (And now I've really said too much.)

But they are no longer important. The important thing is my willingness to deal with my life as it is now. I have burdens to carry, people to love, and hopefully a good job to take me up really soon. :/ I want to hug people who are hurting, because I know what it feels like to be hurt. And... I don't know. I think when it comes to life, we just have to learn to deal.

Posted by Tashi Core

03 February 2014

Brand New Interview Meme

I took a while to do this because I am not always in SL anymore. My RL hasn't settled as I am still looking for a job, and I do get a little fidgety. It is not about whether I will eventually get a job or not, but the feeling of being in suspense while waiting for interview replies and being hesitant in applying for less-than-ideal positions (in case the ideal ones decide that I don't fit), and then worrying if I are prepared enough for the interviews, it can all be daunting.

But! I am good at kicking up a big fussconvincing SL friends to my cause, so I managed to get 2 friends who were willing to interview me. Maybe this compensates for my (lack of) quantity of SL friends. :p

My first interviewer was Debbie Jasper, my new fake wife inspired by Berry's fake marriage. I get that I am so not original but at least, I added a twist! My fake marriage is a lesbian one! We are about as sexually attracted to each other as two north poles of two magnets. It is probably why she has gotten herself a slave now. But more about this slave thing later. There are details in my second interview with Redice Cioc.

Before I launch, I need to let you know that there is quite a bit of Singlish involved, so our grammar may sound weird to you. All 3 of us are Singaporeans, and if you can avoid Singlish with a Singaporean, then you are not a Singaporean. If you get confused, please refer to the The Singlish Dictionary tab for your learning pleasure. If you do not find an explanation there, you can ask me directly. Com'on, Singlish is fun! :D

Debbie: Hi Tashi, I am always curious as to how you came to know about SL?
Me: I think I blogged about it before. Lemme see if I can find the post. Anyway, I heard of SL when it first launched in Singapore. At that time, mIRC was the "in" thing, and SL was a hit with one of my mIRC groups. Here, this blog post tells the rest. I didn't catch on to SL at the beginning because I was distracted by events in my RL and was phasing out of the internet world. But a few years ago, I came back and the rest is history.

Debbie: Wah... What else to ask lol. You came into SL in 2010 right. So when you first came into SL... what was it that kept you coming back?
Me: Oh it was the fashion and home-decorating. I have a thing for virtual home decoration and I get addicted to virtual home decorating games. I think that was why I eventually started building houses and furniture in SL.

Debbie: I know you are part of a vamp family?
Me: Yeah, I am in a bloodlines family.
Debbie: Do you really think there is a possibility of real family relationship to develop in SL?
Me: To be honest, I am not the sort that goes around calling people family (unless it is a total joke). Although as I get to know people better in SL, I do think of them as real friends. But even as real friends I have known them for at most 3-4 years. For me, that is not long enough of a foundation to be family. I'll like to get to be closer with some friends for sure, but it takes time. And for me, a much longer time. :)
Debbie: Yeah... it's also hard for me to open up too quickly to someone I just met to call one a family. :)

Debbie: And how did you end up being a vamp?
Me: I met a girl who warned me about bloodlines players going around to anyhow bite people. Instead of becoming wary, I decided it was interesting and started to explore it lol. I didn't plan to commit to any groups though, so I created alts to go around looking for a chance to be victims. I explored about 3 clans altogether.
Debbie: And you decided to stay with one?
Me: My current clan was one of them. One of my alts was at the NCI public dressing room when I saw another noob with the tag "Eturnal Bloodangel" on her head. I thought "Bingo!" and chatted her up. So she took me to the Eturnal clan's SIM where I met Sashia, who ended up having to put up with me. :)

Debbie: I know you are one of those who play with rather many alts lol.... Do you then think so, with the ease of creating new accounts, it's easy for one to hide their real identity and thus making the SL a rather fake and unfeeling world to be?
Me: Wa... I need to study sociology for this one.
Debbie: lol
Me: At a personal level, I am ok with the idea of a user holding many accounts. No matter that a person is or is not a troublemaker, having many alts doesn't change that person. I also think it is actually much easier in SL to protect oneself from real harm, so I think it is really a matter of knowing where to draw my own line. If someone (uses SL anonymity to) grieves me, I'll just handle it as it comes.

Debbie: I guess I know you enough to trust you to be using them with caution, but have you encountered anyone who's against the idea of multiple accounts?
Me: I have met people who say they only have one AV because they don't need to be anyone else or they are proud to be who they are or they have nothing to hide blah blah blah..
Debbie: Ya lor lol
Me: I just ignore them and do my own thing. They don't decide my fun. But I am not sure if they are really judgmental or not, they could just be making a statement about their preference. Since I didn't bother to confront them, I'll give them benefit of doubt. :)
Debbie: Yea, sometimes it's better to 'trust' that they are telling the truth. Anyway hor..... our interview is very serious leh.
Me: Ya lor, I was thinking how come har? hahaha
Debbie: You sure want to post it? lol
Me: I'll decide when I edit the grammar.
Debbie: Ya... But the content is the same mah.
Me: So you can ask something light-hearted or not? lol

Debbie: Hmmmm Why do you want to partner me har? LOL Light enough?
Me: I fell in love with you when I was interviewing you. I like sweet romantic innocent girls. They are a great complement for my cynical, maniacal BDSM taste. Muahahahahha! (To get this, you must read the interview I did for Debbie when she posts it, if she ever posts it.)
Debbie: LOL feel like vomiting.
Me: Ok, now I am having second thoughts about posting this interview on my blog.
Debbie: lol I know la. You know…
Me: You know I know what?
Debbie: I still think we must have an idea what the interview is about... if not it will end up as our biography.
Me: U dun so serious can or not? lol No wonder you are not a reporter.
Debbie: Oh, I thought reporters are serious people.
Me: Not all. But it might be because I read more entertainment news than real news. Maybe you will make a good serious news reporter. I will do as a gossip tabloid reporter.

And we got distracted discussing our potential new career as reporters...

And now for Redice's interview, but let's take a short break here with a picture I did to wish you a Happy Valentine's.

(I found my "lover"! And my Sailormoon underwear!)

Redice: Hello Ms Core. What u doing in SL these days?
Me: lol I wasn't doing much. I kind of got bored, then Strawberry's fake marriage gave you the idea that it is something I can try. I wanted to partner you since it was your suggestion, but you didn't come in-world in time. So I partnered Debbie instead.
Redice: Well I can't help it. I went online you not in. But is ok. Glad you found a partner.
Me: I am now a lesbian in SL. And I don't know what happened but Debbie and I had a chat and we are thinking we should do BDSM... and not with each other. We are auditioning for suitable slaves now. Ok actually I am joking. I don't do SLex. I do like the idea of having a slave though. hee

Redice: Oh. What is your criteria for slave? Anyone will do?
Me: I haven't thought of it actually. I think Debbie has a better idea what she wants. :p I'll just share with her.
Me: Oh god, I think I am going to ruin her reputation with this interview.
Redice: haha
Me: My one rule is still no SLex though. So I can't have a horny slave.
Redice: Me too if i do this.
Me: Oh, you also don't do SLex?
Redice: Unless I like him :)
Me: Oh, ah.
Redice: I haven't crossed the line in SL so I don't think much about it. Is your blog censor ok with this topic? We can skip, you know.
Me: I am fine. I'm pretty open about this topic.
Redice: Can the slave be of any gender? I am sure blog readers are interested so they can see whether they can apply.
Me: Yeah, they can. I haven't really set any criteria yet. But I think I would be happy if they are interested in the bloodlines game. Then again, I also need to set their expectations. I don't login to SL consistently and may go absent for a few days at a time, so they can't complain when that happens. I need a balanced RL and daily SL just doesn't do it for me anymore.
Redice: Ah yes understand your feeling about this. SL takes up a lot of time.
Me: I still love SL though. :)
Redice: me too ^_^
Me: Great, I'll still see you in-world again then... every few months. :p
Redice: ya every few months

Redice: What about kittycats? You like kittycats last time.
Me: I still love them, but they are very time-consuming so I decided I'll not take them up again for now.
Redice: Do you have them as pets in SL?
Me: No house at the moment, they are in my inventory and some are with my alt. I still have a few hundred unborn kitten boxes in my cattery too.
Redice: Ah can sell them you know.
Me: Their traits are outdated and I am lazy to check out the market sims. I'll see how I can use them when and if I get down to sorting them out. I'll sort out RL and get settled first. :)
Redice: Time to watch pandas Kai Kai and Jia Jia show. So I should end this interview. Thank you for considering me as interviewer. :)
Me: lol ok, Thank you for interviewing me.

Redice: As I am also your blog reader, could you update on the BSDM slave thing when you have a chance? I am curious on how it works.
Me: Sure, provided I keep up with what I just said. lol

I have no good way to end this interview because it ended so abruptly. But I sure had fun doing both interviews. I'll talk again in my next blog post. This one is very long enough.

Posted by Tashi Core

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